Light up the Darkness.

The Writer

A Simple Gal With Extraordinary Personality
She Keeps Her Heart Guarded Most Of The Time
A Gal Who Has Lost Many Things In Life
A Gal Who Still Believes A Sparkle May Appear
In Her Dark Life

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Clicks

Shamz
Syamsiah
Kai Hoon
Nareeza
Sanju
Jess
Rina
Filza
Kelly
Sindhu
Kirthi
Gayathiri
Narezza

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Who am I?@Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Who is this new person in me? Where is my confidence? Where is my fighting spirit? Where is my determination? Where are my dreams? Where is my ambition or what was my ambition? Why am i in dis state?
Too many questions but i can't seem to find the answer nor myself. Am i lost or haf i lose myself in the crowd?

Education, Career, Love, Friendship, Family, Finance nothing seem to be working for me. People are questioning me but how am i suppose to answer them
when i myself don't haf an answer for my own questions.
Anger, Frustration, Hurt, Ignored, Irritated, Sad are da emotions i am filled up with.
Most of us pray that God shows his prsence infront of us so that we can ask for 3 wishes but i would juz ask one wish which is juz take me back from where i was
created i would rather be above helping people behalf of him as he is too busy helping too many people.

Some people mentioned that me being at home has made me into a lunatic person and some said that i maybe suffering from depression. If i was really suffering from depression i would haf done many unsightly things. Haha.
3 months at home doing nothing, without a single cent and juz being cooped in the room is neva an easy task and dats what i haf been doing.

No matter how much i haf helped and done good things i was neva thanked or even appreciated. The outcome was i am an useless and a hopeless person.
In everyone's life someone new seems to enter and when dat happens dey seem to forget the old ones who were dere when dey need or wen dey don't need.
She always mentioned that i am a jinx but i haf always shielded myself saying no i'm not a jinx but a blessed child but looking at how things are going i am trying to realise how true her words are.

Now i myself dun noe where i'm heading to. Which path am i taking or what am i juz asking for. People haf observed that i am not whom i was. I seem to be changed, stoning and quieter which i dun normally do or was. Being a 23yrs old so called young adult but i do not haf a freedom of speech at all not even at home. In this entry i just don't know what to conclude or where am i suppose to end. Speechless.

Labels: Lost of Words

Scribbled by Breaks Da Hearts Of Many Guys.

Random Updates@Tuesday, June 12, 2007

After much deep thoughts i am still wondering wad to blog about. Well maybe some little updates about what ever is happening in my current life.

Basically attended a few functions. One ROM, 2 weddings and 1 ear piercing ceremony. My mum sisters and brother came from overseas for the functions. Its kinda funny wen ur niece and nephew ask who are u? lolz. The kids were really adorable. The most cutest ones i love is my two little nieces. One of dem is named Subiksha Lavania who is 3yrs old and the other is Vikashini Varnika who is juz 7mths old. But the sad part is they are all leaving on the coming week i guess.

Attending wedding and Rom can be hectic at times coz deciding on wad to wear and stuff. But atlast all ended in a happy way. Two of the weddings i wore saree. and the ROM i wore a Vietnamese chongsam kinda fusion. Actually nothing can beat traditional costume.

Other den dis functions, well met up wif Rina, Kelly and Trish for the grad ceremony. Although there were only 4 of us representing ISF, it was kinda ok. But the fun part was taking pics and chillin at parkway parade coffeebean.

I am still swimming through sea of rocks yet to reach the smooth part neither the shore but am still surviving. I have been cooped at home for quite a number of days. Even my sis is too busy to go out wif me coz she has her own frenz. As for me, i go walking ard near khatib and northpoint, arcade and etc alone. Friends are busy with their own life therefore dun wish to disturb their privacy. Once i get a job i will be busy with my own life. Just waiting for that moment. I guess I haf update enuff of my current outings and life. If there is any random entry will post it up soon. Till den juz glance through some pics taken during grad ceremony, and some random pics.

all ready to go 4 da wedding